Our Red Thread
An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet,
Regardless of time, place, or circumstance.
The thread may stretch or tangle
But it will never break.
(Ancient Chinese Belief)
There is a tradition in China that loved ones and friends are connected together by an invisible red thread. In every significant relationship this red thread binds individuals together across distances, countries, ages, ethnicities, etc. to form a unit. You can see evidence of the red thread in shared dates, beliefs, names, coincidences, experiences, etc. Here is the story of our red thread:
As many of you know, we have been in the process of adopting a little girl from China for almost 4 years. As our paper work drew closer to yet another expiration date, we decided to withdraw our application and quit the whole process. When our social worker contacted us about setting up an appointment for our home study update, we told her we did not need it because we were pulling out.
And then our quarterly newsletter from Holt (the agency that handles the international adoption with China) arrived. I was in the process of throwing it away – without reading it - when a headline caught my eye. It said something along the lines of “we thought we would get a girl but ended up with the boy of our dreams.” This surprised me and I wondered how someone got a little boy from China since I had been under the impression that the only boys available were those with severe special needs. Skimming the article, I saw a new program referred to: China’s Child of Promise. I told Eric about it that night and we decided we should check it out so that we could honestly say that we tried everything before we decided to cancel our application.
The next day I called Holt and learned that the Child of Promise Program was a new program developed by China and that only a handful of agencies were invited to participate. Holt was one of the few. The program was for the placement of children with what are termed very minor or easily correctible special needs. Our Holt social worker went on to explain that there were a lot of boys in the program because China has a very specific ideal of what they considered a “normal, healthy child.” For example, things we would not think twice about like birth marks and herniated umbilical cords are considered special needs. He also told us that if we were open to a boy that our wait time would be cut significantly because only about 6% of people were open to receiving a boy. He told us we could conceivably receive a match within 3-4 months.
We were astonished! We had never considered a boy. We prayed about it and decided to go forward with the new program and told Holt we were willing to tak
e a boy or a girl. We spent the next two weeks frantically redoing everything before they expired: home study, physicals, paperwork, fingerprints, etc. We also needed to switch our paperwork to accommodate a special needs child. We finally finished everything and e-mailed the paperwork to Holt on Monday, November 17th. They e-mailed back and told us we needed one more paper and some updated photos. Eric was out of town, so when he returned on Thursday we completed the required items. They were e-mailed to Holt around 8:30 am on November 21st (Eric’s birthday). That evening, around 4:30 pm, we were contacted by Holt with a match!We could not believe it! We never imagined receiving a match in 8 hours after our paperwork was completed. We had never heard of such a thing! We were matched with a little boy who is 2 years 5 months old. He was abandoned on an orphanage steps when he was (estimated) 3 weeks old. His (estimated) birthday is June 17, 2006. We found out that birthday is shared with 3 of our good friends! His “special need” is a club foot. However, it is so minor that it does not require surgery. He wears orthopedics and goes to therapy. We will have him reassessed once he comes home and we will continue whatever treatments are necessary.
We have decided to name him Emmett Eric Sharp. Hannah and Lilly are so excited. We learned that even before we turned our paperwork in that Lilly was telling her primary and preschool teachers about her baby brother from China! They say children know before we do because they are closer to the veil and I am beginning to think it is true. We have been spending the past few weeks preparing our home for a little boy: switching bedrooms, neutralizing our current pink flowery bathroom, etc. We are waiting now for updated measurements so that we can begin to purchase clothing for him. We anticipate traveling to China sometime in February/March to pick him up.
We have been humbled and amazed to see the hand of the Lord throughout this process. We thought we knew what we wanted, but the Lord knew better. We thought we knew when, but the Lord knew better. Looking back we see that He was in control from the beginning and we were being taught and prepared for His way. How grateful we are for His wisdom and love that blesses us every day! Though we talk about red threads that bind us, we know it is the Lord who binds us together as friends and family – all part of His children and His great plan.
